Earlier this year, I shared with you about my surgery through some blog posts. Because of that, I had a three-month gap.
Before this happened, I’d always dreamed of having a few months off. I thought I’d relax, do things I loved, or just lie down and breathe. Maybe take lonely walks or meditate.
But when I actually had to rest for months, just lying there and breathing, I nearly panicked.
It felt like being dropped in deep water without knowing how to swim. I couldn’t relax enough to float. I just thrashed about, trying to escape. I just tried to get out. The more I tried, the more I sank. The more I wanted things to change, the more mixed up I felt.
I’m the kind of person who’s always chasing productivity. It took me two months just to get used to resting.
Turns out, resting is something you need to learn.
We all want a break, but when we actually get one, we’re afraid we’re being lazy.
I worried about what to do on my rest days. While others were rushing ahead, there I was, doing nothing. All my personal projects were on ice. “How can I make these rest days worthwhile?” – the question kept nagging at me.
In our fast-paced world, somehow resting has become seen as lazy and wrong. Everyone’s in such a hurry, scared that if they slow down even a bit, they’ll be left behind.
It wasn’t until the third and also final month of my break that I started to go with the flow. I began to truly enjoy my recovery time – just before I had to go back to my nine-to-five life. I think I’ve become someone quite different.
That’s when I realized. Sometimes, the best thing to do is nothing. Let your cup be still. Just be at peace and do nothing. In that quiet, as things settle down, you’ll find what you’re looking for.
In this blog post, let’s find out how to rest without feeling guilty and truly allow ourselves to recharge.
Table of Contents
Why We Find It Hard To Do Nothing
We live in a world that never seems to slow down. Everywhere we look, there’s a message telling us to do more, be more, achieve more. It’s like we’re all in a race, but no one knows where the finish line is.
There are many stories about people who work hard and get things done. These stories make us feel like we need to be busy all the time if we want our lives to be worth living. It’s as if our value as a person depends on how much we can get done.
Social media makes this even harder. Posts show that people are always working on big projects or doing amazing things. It’s easy to feel like we’re behind or losing out if we don’t do the same.
Being pushed all the time to get things done can make us feel guilty when we try to rest. We might think taking a break means we’re lazy or wasting time. Even when we’re on vacation, we may feel the need to check our work emails or think about all the unfinished tasks. Even when we’re sick, we might feel bad about taking the day off, worried that we’re not doing enough.
This fear shows up in many ways in our daily lives. Maybe you’ve felt guilty for spending an afternoon reading a book instead of tackling your to-do list. Or perhaps you can’t enjoy a movie night because you keep thinking about the work you need to do.
The truth is that this need to be productive can make us feel exhausted and unhappy. I was there, you’re not alone. So, in the next part, we’ll talk about how we can start to overcome these feelings of guilt and learn to truly rest.
How to Rest Without Feeling Guilty
Rest guilt is the constant thought that we’re being lazy or unproductive when we take time to relax. But it took me so much time to realise that rest isn’t a luxury. It’s important for our health and long-term performance.
Let’s look at some ways we can overcome rest guilt and truly allow ourselves to recharge.
Reframe your mindset
Rest isn’t lazy. It’s essential. Rest is not the opposite of productivity. It’s part of it.
Think of rest as an investment. You’re not wasting time. You’re recharging for better performance. Your mind is like a battery. Work drains it. Rest recharges it.
Without rest, we’re running on empty. With rest, we’re fueled for focus.
The most productive people aren’t those who work non-stop. They’re those who balance intense work with intentional rest.
So, next time you rest, don’t feel guilty. Feel smart. You’re preparing for your next breakthrough.
Digital detox
Our devices are always on. We don’t have to be.
Start with an hour each evening. No phone, no laptop. Just you and the world around you.
What happens in that hour? You might read. Talk with family. Or simply sit in silence. The choice is yours.
At first, it feels strange. Your hand might reach for a phone that isn’t there. That’s okay. It’s part of the process.
Small breaks lead to big changes. One hour can become one day. One day can become one weekend. The goal? Balance. Use technology, don’t let it use you.
Try it tonight. One hour. No screens. See what you discover.
Set aside time to rest
Rest should be just as important to you as your work obligations. Set aside time to relax, and then do it. It might be as easy as setting aside 30 minutes every day to read a book or go for a walk.
You can help yourself relax before bed by making a relaxing habit. Create a bedtime ritual. A warm bath. Gentle stretches. Calm music. Pick one. Stick to it. Find something that works for you and do it every day.
Set clear boundaries
Being able to say “no” is a strong skill. When you need time to rest, it’s okay to say no to extra plans. Your health and happiness are important, and putting them first is not selfish.
Set clear boundaries between work time and free time. When you’re done with work for the day, try to take a break. Don’t let your phone remind you of emails. Allow yourself to focus on taking it easy and resting.
Practice mindfulness and self-compassion
If you still wonder how to rest without feeling guilty, mindfulness is the key. When you do take time to rest, be fully present in the moment. Enjoy the feeling of relaxation. Notice your breath. Be here, now. Guilt may visit. Acknowledge it. Then let it pass. It’s just a thought, not a truth. Just notice them without judging, and then let them go slowly.
Be kind to yourself. Feel sorry for yourself the way you’d feel sorry for a friend. Don’t forget that taking care of yourself isn’t selfish; it’s important.
Focus on the pros
Think about all the good things that happen when you rest. Some of the perks are better sleep, less stress, a better mood, and the ability to concentrate better. When you get enough rest, you’re better able to deal with life’s problems and enjoy its happiness.
Ask for help
Do not be scared to talk about how hard it is for you to deal with rest guilt. Tell your family or friends how you feel. You might be surprised to find that many people face similar challenges.
You might want to join an online or offline society that cares about your health and well-being. A community can turn a personal challenge into a shared journey. Take that first step.
Celebrate your rest
Last but not least, enjoy the rest you do get. You should be proud of yourself for putting yourself first. You’re doing something good for your health and happiness every time you choose to rest.
It takes time to learn how to rest without feeling guilty. Give yourself time. With practice, I hope you can learn to accept rest as an important part of your life that you don’t have to feel guilty about.
Read More:
How to Live a Quiet Life in a Noisy World
The Lasting Word
In the book “Days at the Morisaki Bookshop“, the uncle says to Takako:
“Sometimes in life, we need to try stopping to see what happens. Think of it as a little break on the long journey we call life. This place is like a harbour, and we’re boats anchoring for a while before setting off again. Rest as much as you like, then sail on”.
I’ve been around for nearly 30 years now, and I reckon no matter how tough we try to be, we all have times when we feel hurt and hopeless. It’s a right painful feeling, that.
If the challenges on your growing-up journey ever wear you down, making you feel lost and stuck, why not give yourself permission to find a “mid-journey stop”? Just to breathe. Nothing else, just breathe and slowly tidy up your mind.
Take a moment. Just be.
Your heart will fill up with peace. And you will see the way.
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